Your Free Ticket to a Lifetime of Contentment
WHEN THE PROPANE FOR THE GRILL RAN OUT, WE STOPPED GRILLING.
I had personally learned how to stitch but was still down to one pair of jeans. We had sold everything that wasn’t nailed down, including all of my recording gear. Our fridge was empty, and our pantry was close behind. When the vacuum broke, I vacuumed the house on my hands and knees with a tiny Shop-Vac. “Father, do You see this?” I would ask.
However, throughout this season we knew we were blessed. And we chose to believe it. We chose to see it. Even while we experience great need in this life, we can always find something to be thankful for. Karen and I were able to see His provision in the small things. Even though we were overwhelmed, we guarded our hearts against self-pity.
Self-pity is deadly. It will shred a hopeful believing heart in moments. Whenever Karen and I began to realize we were experiencing self-pity, we would decide to give thanks to God for all of His goodness, often even making a list of all He had done in and for us.
Thankfulness is the key to victory in the battle against self-pity. God is always good and when we focus on His goodness it is impossible not to believe. Looking for evidence of His goodness in our lives and then giving thanks always increases our faith.
Self-pity cannot exist in the presence of thankfulness. I have seen this first hand with my kids. We will be driving down the road after having gone out for pizza, after having gone to the swimming pool, after having gone to the theater, after having gone to the amusement park, after having gone jet skiing, after having flown on a space odyssey through the Dagobah system, when suddenly one of them will remember something we didn’t get to do that day. Then they will begin to complain.
It starts out with a statement like, “we never have any fun,” followed by a list of things they never get to do. As one complaint follows another, the words “never” and “always” are used more and more freely until the minivan is filled with a cloud of self-pity.
That’s when I bark, “Quiet!” Then, “I want five things from each of you that you are grateful for. Quick!”
It starts out slowly, as they can’t seem to think of anything. So I remind them somewhat sarcastically, “Ahh, the Dagobah system?”
Eva, our youngest, likes this game and always gets there first. Finally, Maddy remembers something she is grateful for. Then Ethan follows close behind. A little more time and Maddy has something else, and Ethan has found one more thing.
By now Eva has given ten things that she is grateful for. By the time the older kids get to number four, the atmosphere in the van has changed. And by the time we get to five, we just keep going until we are matching Eva. Eventually, all we see is the goodness of God. There is no end of things we can be thankful for.
I told my kids the other day that joy is found in thankfulness, that contentment is discovered in gratefulness.
Karen and I are learning to practice thankfulness, even when we’re in the tough wilderness seasons—especially when we’re in the tough wilderness seasons. We are convinced that living thankful not only empowers us into joy and peace, but we reveal and empower a legacy of full life, health, and peace for our kids as well. We want to give them the road map to true happiness.
When we practice thankfulness we begin to see God as He is. We also begin to see the fullness of what He has given us. You see, we can only give what we have. While self-pity creates a perception of poverty, thankfulness increases our awareness of how good our Father is and, thus, how rich we truly are. His goodness will become so overwhelming that the desire to give, even in the midst of need, will overcome us, overflowing into radical generosity for our neighbors—because God’s goodness can’t be contained.
Ask The Question
I have three kids, Eva is my youngest and she is at an age where I am beginning to get the questions.
You know, like when I give her a bowl of soup and say “Honey do you want some crackers for your soup?”
“Why?”
“Cause these crackers taste good in soup.”
“Why?”
“Cause they are yummy soup crackers.”
“Why?”
“Because the soup cracker fairy made them yummy for soup.”
“What color is the soup cracker fairy’s dress?”
“Blue.”
“No daddy, it’s pink and purple.”
If you are a parent, or ever spoken with a child, you have laughed, sighed, had your patience stretched, and your heart expanded while answering a question.
If you are a parent, or ever spoken to a child, you also know this next statement to be true: If the question is sincere then there is no such thing as a dumb question.
Questioning is how children learn.
And as parents, or someone who has answered the question, we know that the question reveals a lot about what the child comprehends, and who they are becoming.
In this situation, you may have often responded to the child’s question with a question of your own.
We do this because our question positions our kids for the answer. It’s meant to help them learn how to process and find the answer themselves. It’s about helping them mature.
I have learned that when it comes to a sincere question, our heavenly Father absolutely loves them. This is evidenced in the life of Jesus.
Have you ever noticed that Jesus rarely answers a question directly? When He is asked questions, often His response is to either tell a story or ask His own question.
Even when He was teaching, He almost always raised questions.
Jesus told Nicodemus that to enter the Kingdom of heaven he would have to be born again. Jesus told a large crowd that, unless they ate of His flesh and drank of His blood, they had no life in them. While we now know what Jesus meant, at the time, these were inconceivable thoughts that raised lots more questions.
So why did Jesus often respond to questions by raising more questions? Because questions are one of the best ways to communicate with a free people. And Jesus was absolutely intent on releasing and empowering people into greater freedom.
God loves our freedom, and when I say “loves,” I mean absolutely without even the slightest hint of deviation. He will not compromise even a fraction when it comes to protecting freedom.
Why is freedom so important to Him? Because it’s the atmosphere in which love can exist. And love is the whole point.
Our freedom was what Jesus died to protect, it’s what the cross was all about. It’s the biggest thing that’s ever existed because it’s the soil in which love can be cultivated.
Jesus doesn’t tell free people the answer; he helps them devise a better question. He tells stories and asks His own questions. Along the way, He challenges how we think, and if we are hungry for an answer, we begin to re-form our questions until our mind is—in a word—renewed.
The renewed mind is the one that persists in asking honest questions, knowing that our Father has promised that the answer is soon coming.
“Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you.” (Matthew 7:7)
“Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, they shall be filled.” (Matthew 5:6)
Jesus came to reveal the Father. That was the whole purpose of His years on earth. He told us that if we have seen Him, we have seen the Father (John 14:7). To truly see Him, we simply and persistently ask the honest questions until our perspective is aligned with heavens perspective.
Every sincere question is an invitation into a transformative answer. The honest questions resonate in heaven and pull heaven to earth!
And that’s the whole point of asking questions. It’s a search for what is in heaven, what is in our Fathers heart, so that we can live out His answer here on earth.
When we ask God the authentic question, the answer comes with revelation and power. It sets us free and empowers us to know His love in greater measure.
I am a good dad. I tell my kids that all the time, and they believe me. But I don’t hold a candle to my heavenly Father. As much as I want to answer my kid’s questions, God wants to answer ours more! And He so values us that He waits until our hearts are positioned for the answer, until our question reverberates with the answer that is in His heart, until we are ready to live out the answer.
Everything in the heart of our Father wants to answer the question! He knows the answer will transform and empower, set us free and set us on fire with His love!
If you are a parent, or ever talked with a child, you are well positioned for a renewed mind, for an answered prayer, for becoming like Jesus and living in the wonder and power of heaven.
May you ask more questions then you get answers and may you be transformed along the way!
Finding Kingdom Come
If you think about it, Love walked the earth in the body of Jesus.
And while Jesus very much lived on earth, He very much lived from heaven. So everywhere Love went, heaven invaded earth. What’s astounding to me is that every need that was presented to Love was met and fully answered—physically, emotionally, and spiritually—through the power of heaven. And it often looked miraculous.
Love trumped every need, every time. Love healed the sick, fed the hungry, and raised the dead. Love forgave the prostitute, the adulterer, the thief, and the liar. Love paid
As I’ve said before, I believe the Kingdom of heaven operates from a different core value than earth. While earth revolves around the reality of need, heaven exists in the revelation of love. Everything in the Kingdom of heaven operates, hinges, and moves in that reality. Love trumps.
Need doesn’t exist in heaven. We won’t need to be healed in heaven; there is no sickness there. We won’t need to feel loved; we will know and become love. We won’t know poverty, sadness, or confusion; our Father is rich in mercy and grace. We won’t have any questions about why we exist; the manifest glory of God will make it clear.
“Jesus told us that the Kingdom of heaven, the place that operates in love, is ‘at hand.’ In other words, this Kingdom is within reach—all of heaven is available to us now.”
I believe that we have access to the same heaven that Jesus did. He revealed that we could live in the same revelation of our Father that He lived in when He taught us to pray, “
As a friend of mine, Andy Squyres, says, “Earth is the only place we can love God while in need.” Here and now, we have the incredible opportunity to discover that—even while
“Earth is the only place we can love God while in need.”
This is the discovery of God’s Kingdom come!
Intimacy is Your Inheritance
I imagine that when the fellas who translated the Bible came to the story of the prodigal son, there was a debate on what to title it.
I imagine there was much prayer and dialogue that ran late into the night. Coffee was brewed, biscotti laid out, music heatedly discussed until they found consensus in Ray LaMontagne’s “Till the Sun Turns Black.” Finally, they came to an agreement. Then the archbishop/apostle/ leader guy stood, and, brushing the biscotti crumbs from his beard, he made his proclamation. Standing straight, shoulders back, chin up, and in a piercing nasal voice, he declared in high English, “Let this story heretofore be known as ‘The Prodigal Son.’”
“I am convinced that our true inheritance as believers has nothing to do with money, land, or possessions of any kind. It’s simply our Father’s love revealed.”
Yeah, I have no idea how it got its title, but if I’d been there we would have listened to Bon Iver. But more to the point, I would have argued ardently and well that the story be titled, “The Good Father.”
I am not saying they got it wrong, so please don’t go telling everyone that Ray LaMontagne was a bad choice or that I think the Bible is flawed. I’m just saying I think that title is a little misleading as the story isn’t fully about either of the sons but about the father.
The fact is that every story Jesus ever told was about a good father. Jesus’s very existence, every breath He took, revealed the good Father.
I am convinced that our true inheritance as believers has nothing to do with money, land, or possessions of any kind. It’s simply our Father’s love revealed.
“I believe that it was at this moment that the younger son first truly saw his father as his dad; it was the first time the son discovered his father’s true nature—love.”
The younger son came home ready to beg for a place with the servants. Before he could even get to the front door, his dad is running out to meet him. Before he could even begin to say what he had probably rehearsed the whole way home, his dad is hugging and kissing and overwhelming him with affection.
I believe that it was at this moment that the younger son first truly saw his father as his dad; it was the first time the son discovered his father’s true nature—love. And that is the moment he actually received his inheritance. Our inheritance is only available through a revelation of our Father’s true nature. And our inheritance looks like, feels like, and in fact is intimacy.